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A REVOLUTION IN TACO CONSUMPTION
Category: Personal
Friday, July 14th, 2006 @ 12:20 pm
Posted By Brent

I'm not really sure of what the catalyst was, but we have been making a shit ton of tacos as of late. Well, not "homemade" tacos per se, but ones of the "taco kit" variety. If I had to go out on a limb and give reasons I'd have to say

  • They are easy to make
  • They take relatively zero time to prepare
  • They are God's gifts to my tastebuds
  • As if life wasn't perfect enough, some genius came along and had to revolutionize tacos, thus altering the course of human kind forever: tacos that you can stand up. That's right. You can stand them up.

    I don't know about you, but for me this is mo-fucking-mentous. This means there was a man somewhere that, against all odds, knew that the taco was still not at its pinnacle yet - that there was work yet to be done in the field of taco-ology, and he had the chutzpa to see it through.

    Will his name ever be known? Will he receive any awards? Will the world ever recognize him for his actions? Will they ever, at the very least, make one of those "Real Men of Genius" radio commercials about him? Doubtful, so I will make this page a tribute to him.

    Dear Mr Stand n' Stuff Taco Creator, you are truly and inspiration to us all. You saw the trials and tribulations that Joe Six-Pack had to go through to stuff his taco. Holding it in one hand, possibly having hot grease run down your arm while filling it. Then, the trip from the counter to the table was fraught with the perils of tacos falling over, spilling their precious payloads. In addition, the taco shells of antiquity, with their prehistoric design, were not structurally sound enough to withstand the first bite, they would shatter in two, leaving the diner to have to scrounge the taco remainder with his fingers. Your shells have a perpendicular flat bottom that absorbs this shock and stays strong. Most of the time at least, which is better than none in my book.

    I could go on and on, but honestly I'm starting to get choked up a bit. I'll just have to end it here.




    Comments

    NAME: Tazatron
    Wednesday, September 30th, 2009 @ 09:22 am
    This is your guy

    United States Patent D590,126
    Kovich , et al. April 14, 2009
    Square bottom taco shell
    Claims
    CLAIM The ornamental design for a square bottom taco shell, as shown and described.
    Inventors: Kovich; Nicholas D. (Minneapolis, MN), Richards; Anthony W. (Poplar, WI)
    Assignee: General Mills Cereals, LLC (Minneapolis, MN)
    Appl. No.: D/268,095
    Filed: October 30, 2006


    NAME: pizza party lover
    Tuesday, July 18th, 2006 @ 07:11 pm
    The engineer of that taco shell gets an a+ but the meat in the taco looks like ass.I bet you bomb your tacos with onions Glitch.

    Pizza will lay flat for you every time.


    NAME: scott
    Monday, July 17th, 2006 @ 12:47 pm
    That's bullshit. A fire extinguisher can also be a roller.

    I'm totally calling the fire marshall on you.


    NAME: brent
    Monday, July 17th, 2006 @ 12:24 pm
    Here, here.

    Especially if you follow the Alton Brown philosophy of single-use food preperation tools. Actually he says the only single-use tool you need in a kitchen is a fire extinguisher, but my fire extinguisher is a zero use tool seeming as it is older than Jesus and the pin is missing from the trigger.


    NAME: scott
    Saturday, July 15th, 2006 @ 03:30 pm
    Truly, this unnamed engineer is worthy of a Nobel Prize. I'm sure the people who make those little stands that you line tacos up in would disagree, but they're (and this is only one man's opinion here) a bunch of assholes.


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